People

By the way, I don't feel that way about my IBS anymore. I was thinking about it and, as much as it sucks to have IBS-C, it would probably equally suck to have IBS-D. You know, I occasionally get the opposite and even though I feel empty and like my body is working, it is equally painful. So, it took awhile, but I've come off of my high horse.

Anyway, this post is about how I feel about people. As you can imagine, I have a strange and complex view of people. They scare me, for some reason. I get physical reactions just being around them.What might surprise some of you is that I love people. I really do. I really care about people, especially their well-being and emotional health. If I could be a good, full time philanthropist, I would be.

In a certain special something of mine, it is mentioned that I will find joy in helping others because charity is the pure love of Christ. I believe that (and I believe it is true for everyone).

Sometimes however, I get mad at people. I hate when people kill other people. I hate it when they treat each other badly. I hate when they lie or do the wrong things for the wrong reasons. I hate it when they get selfish or inconsiderate. I hate it when they judge each other.

Obviously, I am not perfect. I have problems too. The thing is that we try. We all struggle, but instead of giving up, we keep going. I like that about us. I know there is good in everyone, and that gives me a great deal of comfort.

Ick.

I. Feel. Horrible right now.

I feel like something chewed me up and spit me back out. On top of the usual depression and anxiety issues, I found out that the reason I have been chronically constipated since last year is that I have IBS.

Apparently, a lot of people have it, but - and I don't feel this way about most of my problems - I feel like mine is worse. Everyone keeps saying how they're doing better and how they avoid certain foods. Not that I've tried that, but I can't go without daily Miralax or fiber. I don't think avoiding things will help that much. I was prescribed Amitiza. Who is on that?

It's stupid and childish, but I never said I wasn't either of those things.

Anyway, it is linked with serotonin levels. Like depression. So this was basically going to happen no matter what. If Amitiza doesn't help, I will go mad. I can't possibly deal with this for the rest of my life. I don't want to. Everyone makes it sound like it isn't a big deal, but my stomach hurts and gurgles constantly, I cannot go at all without aid, and I've lost a lot of weight. The last one is great, but apparently it is a bad thing in the medical community.

I just want to eat what I want and not worry about my digestion. It sounds like it's not big deal, but being constipated (occasionally the opposite problem) everyday?!

6,000 years old?

Apparently some people somewhere think that the Earth is only 6,000 years old. That's dumb. The Earth, as proven by geological records, is 4.5 billion years old.

Fact.