Ants

There has been a spider in the bathroom for awhile. It's one of those smallish ones that don't hang from the ceiling and freak you out, so I was okay with him. I noticed he (or she?) was wrapping his ant victims and moving them around. At first I felt bad for the ants. Then I felt okay because they were already dead. Then I felt like buying the spider a beer (for lack of a better term). It has never left that web and yet it has three immediately visible ant bodies.

Notice how I said immediately visible? Upon further examination of the spider's surroundings, I noticed an ant massacre had taken place in my absence (sorry ants, but my bladder just doesn't get full that quickly). I judged them immediately as stupid. How can so many ants not notice the (relatively) giant, 8-legged cesspool of ugly looming overhead? Let alone their fallen brethren and sistren's curled corpses laying around?

But now I'm thinking that perhaps so many of them died not because they were stupid, but because they were focused. I mean, really, mortally focused? That's admirable, I don't care what you think. If people did that, we'd get a lot of things done. We'd also be free of an overpopulation problem - not saying that's the proper solution, just pointing out the silver linings here.

It's just dedication. We all know that ants work very hard and they're very strong, but they're also dedicated. They don't care that all they're doing is moving crumbs around and ruining peoples' picnics! They just do what they know they have to do. People sometimes have a hard time with that. I have a hard time with that.

I want to know why I'm doing something. I need to know that there is a purpose. I've never been one to just do what I'm told "because". Because isn't a good reason. And maybe that's something I need to fix.