Growing up is weird.

There is so much weirdness to growing up that I could go on for hours, but I'd rather focus on one aspect that's been on my mind and that is making and losing friends. 

I grew up with one best friend. We were extremely close in elementary school from the age of 5. She was way smarter than me, so as we got older, we had fewer classes together, but we still hung out whenever possible. Middle school came by and we drifted apart even more due to scholastic differences and also clique differences (I was in this punk group, it was awesome!). Then high school came. We had virtually no classes together except orchestra (where she would sometimes play the trumpet). I hung out with her and her friends during lunch. I guess they were my friends, too, but I was the bad influence. I was different. 

And the main thing that made me different was school. They were all just amazing students who got amazing grades and had amazing prospects for future scholastic success. While I was just barely passing, probably going nowhere, suffering with mental health issues. 

I thought things would change after high school, but they didn't. In fact, we're all now further apart because of religious and political differences. It's strange how these subtle things can get to me. And I almost know it's not just me who feels this way. I can't relate to them anymore. We feel differently and sometimes strongly about our beliefs. We offend each other with our differing views. 

It's weird how those things get in the way, especially since I've always considered myself a tolerant person (not tolerant of B.S., but of differences). Anyway, I haven't seen that best friend in 2 years and we don't talk much. I've made some really great new friends, but it's just weird losing the old ones over these kinds of differences. They're big differences, but still.