So, at John's advice, I contacted Dr.K and told her I was not taking the paxil. She asked why and I told her that I was too scared of the side-effects. She asked which ones and I instantly listed the sexual dysfunction, the insane weight gain, and the constipation. I have enough of those three things already, and they're just now improving with the gabapentin. No thanks.
She continued to say that it's scary for everyone to start and that not everyone has bad side-effects (though I'm convinced otherwise). She said that I am, of course, free to do what I want, but that she strongly encourages that I take it.
How could I say no to her? She knows what she's doing and I see her in 2 weeks. I can try it for 2 weeks. So I took one just a few hours ago.
It's actually really nice! I don't know if it's the placebo effect (because SSRI's aren't supposed to really kick in for a month plus) or what, but I feel way less depressed already. Motivation hasn't seemed to be affected, but the feeling of absolute misery has turned to like...levelness.
Maybe I'm crazy. It's already making me really tired/stretchy/yawny though and I'm still really worried about the side-effects, but I am willing to give Paxil a real shot.
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